Austerus,

Since reading this thread this morning, I have been ruminating over the differences between Your perceptions and those of VV. I appreciated VV's list, though not comprehensive (and not presented as such) due to the wide variety of subs and Doms, and T/their respective needs/tastes.

I don't believe I (or any Dom) is responsible for every OL sub. I have made no obligation toward any save one. I have not assumed responsibility for any save two, and one of those was in ignorance, but I was honest about My ignorance, at the outset.

I think I agree with Your point, in the main. There certainly is a distinct difference between a responsibility and kindnesses/seemliness. Responsibilities are owed, kindnesses are offered gifts, seemliness may be more pleasant for strangers to observe but is hardly owed. For instance, the wants and desires portion that You mentioned; while I would disagree with You that the wants and desires of the sub should not be taken into account, as the Dom it is ultimately Ours to decide which of these will or will not be fulfilled and when, if ever. These are kindnesses. The punishment when angry is, likewise, the Dom's to decide; there is no responsibility to avoid doing so, although it might appear unseemly to strangers. T/they are strangers for a reason, it is not T/their relationship.

I agree with Your assessment that an accusation of irresponsibility on the part of a Dom ought not to be undertaken lightly. O/one might easily judge from a distance, in ignorance, a situation T/they do not fully understand, which would be irresponsible.

Regards,
CC