I think we have all been here. I had all the same problems in the beginning. Intelligent and quick witted sub that knew exactly what she wanted until she got it and something wasn't right. The truth was I didn't have enough knowledge or confidence. In fact I didn't know what the fuck I was doing half the time. You have to put on a performance and give the air of being in charge even if you are full of anxiety. Everyone says one should Dom with love. My first experience made me realise a little sadism along with the love helps, don't be too kind. Be safe, be in control and enjoy her reaction to your sadistic love.