Generally I am a rather passive person, but between me and the guy I am seeing who is really into BDSM, I am going to be the Dominant. but I am having trouble getting into the mindset and understanding and commanding the natural flow of a good bdsm session.

He has some fun toys- paddles, whips, straps, cuffs, four peice bondage set, etc- but I need to know how to manipulate these things to produce the desired results.