Wrong! If he thought it would hurt you to go into your past, he would avoid the subject or approach it very carefully. (If he is a caring and responsible person who feels for you, that is.)Originally Posted by duktig flicka
Communication, a cornerstone of good relationships of all kinds, vanilla and bdsm, requires you to tell him what you feel. It's the only way he can find out. And finding out is the only way he can get any idea what the right thing to do is.Perhaps not so embarrassed as you are to tell him what you need. If you trust him, show it.He doesn't know that I associate with other people in bdsm. I'm embarassed to tell him.It's not turning it around. That is precisely what it is. And he needs to know.There's no way I can bring up the issue from this post with him. How can I say that without turning it around to be about my needs instead of his?What you have said to us. He already knows you and feels for you, we are a load of strangers. Doesn't he deserve to know what we know?I don't want to be talking about myself all the time. What would I say?
Talking about your needs once isn't 'talking about yourself all the time'. Give him a chance, flicka.
Spike