Quote Originally Posted by duktig flicka
..um..well..
*goes red in the the face*
I don't want to worry him. I've told him briefly that I had some bad stuff in the past, but I don't think he'd want to hear me prattering on about details. If he wanted to know, he'd ask, right?
Wrong! If he thought it would hurt you to go into your past, he would avoid the subject or approach it very carefully. (If he is a caring and responsible person who feels for you, that is.)

Communication, a cornerstone of good relationships of all kinds, vanilla and bdsm, requires you to tell him what you feel. It's the only way he can find out. And finding out is the only way he can get any idea what the right thing to do is.
He doesn't know that I associate with other people in bdsm. I'm embarassed to tell him.
Perhaps not so embarrassed as you are to tell him what you need. If you trust him, show it.
There's no way I can bring up the issue from this post with him. How can I say that without turning it around to be about my needs instead of his?
It's not turning it around. That is precisely what it is. And he needs to know.
I don't want to be talking about myself all the time. What would I say?
What you have said to us. He already knows you and feels for you, we are a load of strangers. Doesn't he deserve to know what we know?

Talking about your needs once isn't 'talking about yourself all the time'. Give him a chance, flicka.

Spike