L'eveil sexuel
by
, 04-03-2016 at 09:22 AM (6537 Views)
I'm back. Again. It's been a loooong journey since the first posts in 2008 when I was first admitting to myself I wanted to be submissive. 8 years of a relationship, 5 of those married, have finally come to an end. Lots learned, but the most important is that I cannot give up myself for someone else. There's a major difference to enjoying submission and being walked upon.
She never became the Domme I wanted. She wasn't able to fully admit to herself what she wanted. And so I went 5 years without sex. Just me, my toys, and some porn. And now I'm happily divorced and exploring what I like.
Turns out I'm a lot kinkier than I thought. And a lot more complicated too. Trying to give myself permission to not seek out a romantic relationship and to just give in to what I want: sex. Kinky sex. Submissive training. Learning who I am in the bedroom and what I want.
I know I'm not a lifestyle sub and I'm not big into tasking, but that's about it. So now I begin my journey of meeting new people and trying to find someone to mentor me. Glad to re-find BDSM LIbrary so I can document the journey.