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A Mother's Submission
Author: warren_Z
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(Added on Jul 2, 2004)
(This month 115285 readers) (Total 199057 readers) |
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A tale of a mother's submission in the complete exploitation of her own daughters. This story does not have a lot of BDSM, but does have a heavy incest theme. Please do not read this story if this subject matter is offensive to you. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 12 |
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67% |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (8/10) |
Average
Rating:  (8.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (10/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (1/10) |
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| Reviewer:
darkmoons
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 23, 2011 |
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Why would they delete this story but keep the second part? Albeit written by a different author, the second part kept the context of its predecessor I'm sure.
This story was made up of words, nothing more, and in fear and cowardness the "library" destroyed it. What a shame. (1/10)
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| Reviewer:
BigCat
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 21, 2005 |
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Well done. Incest stories not my usual cup, but this was so well developed, so well written that the incest aspect was secondary to the control and NC surrender aspects. Good stuff. Thanks. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
bobbi101
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 26, 2004 |
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can not wait for more chapters (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
sissyslave
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 12, 2004 |
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i love the story
hope there will be more chapters soon (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
pippa
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 10, 2004 |
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I loved the story so far( Chapter 8) I have just joined so Have read it in one sitting which I think helped my enjoyment. I thought the Author ( who I presume is a Guy)treated the young girl Michelle's actions and feelings well. Many stories just have guys ramming their cocks up a girl's virgin bottom and the girl creaming!!- I mean thats not real - well I dont think so- I like a story to be believable and realistic once I have accepted the premise the Author has outlined. It excited me and I want more please. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
Dee Driscoll
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 13, 2004 |
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I am in two minds about this story... On one hand it has interesting premise, exciting development, lots of sex, the language is decent, the dialogues are alright. On the other hand, it's just all over the place and I have a problem with many things about it. I appreciate that this is "just" porn, but still I would like to see better balance in terms of pacing, character development and storyline. The characters are halfway there. Frankly, Diane is an idiot and thus I fail to identify with her, feel for her or develop any emotional bond with her. If she was to exist in real life, she would need to be locked in a room and fed through a tube because letting her walk freely would mean instant death for her. Agreed, she is supposed to be subconsciously submissive, but what we get is a brainless cardboard cutout. And she is the only character that we get to read about throughout the whole story (this review being written after the seventh part was posted), the rest of the characters get introduced, they are given some background, some sex happens, and when you expect them to become real people, they are shot in mid-flight, shownthe way to the back seat and another character is introduced and has taken their place. I am wondering whether the author will have to keep introducing new characters to keep it interesting for him, because I feel a lot of unexplored opportunities with the existing ones. That said, the Robert, Janet and Larry characters are stereotypes in the purest sense of the word, but that doesn't mean they don't have potential, it just needs to be developed.
At the same time, I feel the author is being a bit indecisive whether he wants to make Diane a fulltime slave/ slut or if he wants to play her as a confused, partly unwilling participant who seems to be rather devoid of powers of logical thinking or even basic survival instincts. Bringing in the ubiquitous "sedatives" and other mind-altering chemicals is, at least to me, always a signal of authors taking the easy way out rather than bothering to work on a full, complex personality transformation of a sub in a story like this.
Finally, the point of the narrator switches between characters too easily for comfort. I am not saying that this should not be done under any circumstances, but I have never done it in my own writing because I feel it has to be done with GREAT skills and attention: the reader's relationship to the main character is an important thing and it is usually shattered when you view the story through another character's eyes. There are authors who can pull it off, thus making the story feel deeper, but they usually go in with a lot more effort and leave a lot of space for accommodation of the reader. The author of this story switches between characters often in the space of one paragraph and I can't but feel detached from any and all of them, as a result losing the interest to read on. The fact that I indeed DID read on and read all of it, still testifies of the quality of the language, the intriguing scenes and premises in the story and the strong potential the characters possess. (6/10)
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- Replied by:
george Weston
(Edit) (Oct 19, 2004)
- Dee,
really appreciate your great comments...I am new to this and actually took over the story, writing parts 8 and 9 aftger you reviewed it. What do you think of it now? Especially parts 8 & 9. I think I will move into Janet's head and take your approach by focusing on the story only from her viewpoint...George
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| Reviewer:
Amber
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 6, 2004 |
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I just loved the story and can't wait until it continues. Perhaps including, at some ponit, how the father introduced his daughter too? This has been one of my biggest fantasies and I was so aroused to read this very well written story. Thank You! (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
peachers
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 6, 2004 |
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loved this story,easy to read with plenty of great ideas,cann,t wait to see what happens.
one more sister and mum to go. please keep writing, a+++
(9/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 3, 2004 |
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Excellent so far, i love the way Robert has complete control of his wife and she knows wha happens if she does not follow his word
the story can only get better, love the idea of the 2 girls being iunvolved also, nice idea without a blackmail theme (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
lex ludite
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 3, 2004 |
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Passed by this story twice, big mistake. This is the real deal. The writing is well above average, the plot rock solid, the characters fully fleshed, and the character interaction is believable. It generates plenty of heat despite its lack of violence, another sign of a good writer. Finally I appreciate the understated element of horror as the author dispassionately presents the sexual behavior between the doctor and his and her children. I look forward to further installments from this gifted author. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
Mobius
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 2, 2004 |
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I am a sucker for any story with a mother daughter plot. You got me hooked I hope you continue. Very good hope you steer the mother into contact with the daughter A++ keep up the good work (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
applered
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 2, 2004 |
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Giving us a proper background before the abuse started gave it a context and greater depth. The range of characters is strong as well - looking forward to the next instalments (9/10)
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