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Taking Carol Author: Lorddare
(Added on Nov 4, 2002) (This month 102952 readers) (Total 525703 readers)
A young housewife is blindsided by a mysterious new neighbor with an agenda. This is an ongoing story that will be added to at the author's pleasure.

Ratings and Reviews:
Number of Ratings: 73
26 Votes
24 Votes 26 Votes
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0% 1% 0% 3% 4% 4% 7% 12% 33% 36%
Weighed Average (?): (9/10)
Average Rating: (9/10)
Highest Rating: (10/10)
Lowest Rating: (2/10)

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Reviewer: astenon2 (Edit) Rating: Jun 17, 2015
Awesome piece of writing. I loved the story and would love to hear more about what happens next.
This is one of the best stories around (10/10)

Reviewer: Jorgy444 (Edit) Rating: Oct 9, 2012
For those who have scored your story less than a
seven or eight, I am amazed and perplexed. Your
story has everything a writer and reader of erotica
looks for in this genre, and is well constructed
and developed with your characters and scenarios.
You kept me interested and continued to deliver
chapter after chapter great bdsm erotica. Thanks
for writing and please now that Osama is dead write a sequel.
(9/10)

Reviewer: toserveu2 (Edit) Rating: Apr 23, 2012
As a male sub I dont usually read lesbian based stories but I loved the addition of male slaves. Need to find me some???
Very well written. Had a few good wanks whilst reading lol (9/10)

Reviewer: happi (Edit) Rating: Apr 22, 2012
good story any with carol i enjoy it (7/10)

Reviewer: saskatchewanslut (Edit) Rating: Jan 10, 2012
An excellent story and one that is very different from so many others in that neither of the main characters are teenagers. I love stories with younger mains, especially highschool themed stories, but it is refreshing to read something with older participants.
The story itself is something that has been done before but rarely as well and as cleverly crafted. The story is often predictable but the strength of the writing propels the plot and you are happy to be taken on the ride even though you are fully aware of the destination.
Karen and Carol are distinct and true to their own characters and this is something quite rare in bdsm fiction. More often than not the characters exist merely as the means to play through a scene but in Taking Carol they feel more a part of the story than mere props in a scene.
So many bdsm stories fall into the trap of speeding past conversations and setting the mood of a scene just so the story can be forced towards the next whipping. Thankfully the endless round of brief exposition leading to sex/torture is dispensed with here and it feels like a real story, with the characters doing things other than just biding their time until the next “scene”.
Ultimately though, the true test of a story is in its ability to arouse the reader. Taking Carol does not disappoint. It is one of a handful of stories that has kept me reading and reading and hoping that I was not nearing the end any time soon. I found myself trying to prolong each reading session but ultimately I could not. It is also one of the few stories I find myself rereading every now and then, sometimes I return to my favorite passages.
Unfortunately, as with so many stories in this genre the ending seemed to move away from the real story, almost as if the author felt the need to constantly top each previous section. I am probably in the minority but I would rather stories remain true to their theme and end strong but openended. This is just a personal preference and Taking Carol remains one of the greats.
(9/10)
Replied by: lorddare (Edit) (Feb 12, 2012)
Thank you so much for your kind review, saskatchewanslut. It is nice to feel appreciated.
LD

Reviewer: starglitter (Edit) Rating: Jul 9, 2011
Magnificent! Took me awhile to finish it but gave me something to look forward to reading. The book you can't put down! Keep writing! (10/10)

Reviewer: John Tagliaferro (Edit) Rating: Nov 30, 2010
Great story! One of my favorite elements is leveraging a mild blackmail into full control and this story does that well. Like "Owned Teacher", the only thing this story needs to be a money maker is a professional editor.
Some things seemed over explained, or redundant. Maybe that is just my taste, your other readers do not seem to mind, so don't take that as a core complaint.
(8/10)
Replied by: lorddare (Edit) (Dec 16, 2010)
Thank you John. Owned Teacher was actually a great inspiration in writing this story. Although it is very poorly written the energy and story line are great. That one is a classic. LD

Reviewer: Nyxx (Edit) Rating: May 22, 2010
Superb! I loved the evolution of the story from Carol, a BSDM 'innocent' to the dynamic of Karen and Tawny and their growing brood!
Better than some 'mainstream' books I've read, I can see myself looking forward to rereading this in the future (hopefully with a few more additions?), an excellent piece of work! :) (10/10)
Replied by: lorddare (Edit) (May 29, 2010)
Thank you very much for your kind review. Life (kids and job) have interfered with my time to write. With reviews like this I am encouraged to go at it again, though.
LD

Reviewer: wingedone (Edit) Rating: Dec 22, 2009
I found it spellbinding. I thoroughly enjoyed it and very much hope that there will be a follow up to the story. I have bookmarked the story and Sir will be reading it soon. I cannot wait to see his reaction as I know it will make his wicked mind tick over a mile a minute.
Though there were parts that made me cringe in horror, I fouind myself highly aroused at the same time. I still kept devouring the story. For a first time you did a first rate job and I am happy to say you rate better than alot of the published books we have purchased.
Now I just have to wait patiently to see what you come up with next. Thank you for making the last few nights such a rare treat of utter horniness for me. (10/10)

Reviewer: bullfinch (Edit) Rating: Dec 8, 2008
A great read, well developed, plausible characters, Miss Karen is one of my Favourite FemDom women. (10/10)

Reviewer: insatable (Edit) Rating: Oct 8, 2008
Long but held my interest ALL the way through. I'd even like MORE.......Hope the author takes a notion to continue (10/10)
Replied by: lorddare (Edit) (Oct 8, 2008)
Thank you very much for your kind words and excellent judgement in scoring it a 10! I have been waiting for Osama to be killed or captured to continue with a sequel. It has been a long wait.

Reviewer: SternByNature (Edit) Rating: May 24, 2008
very detailed....poor lil Megan nah (10/10)

Reviewer: azrlg17 (Edit) Rating: Apr 25, 2008
Nice story with some very hot scenes. The author should have left the CIA stuff out since it makes it a bit unbelievable. They've been burned too often so if they practice they probably do it on foreigners since no one important in the states would care about that. And the drugs Karen uses could warrant a scifi label. Also Karen makes many mistakes that could end up compromising her. Her initial blackmail of Carol should not have worked. I mean Carol was already considering divorce, maybe her school would fire her but probably not and why should her mother care if she was an adulteress? Maybe her mother in law but that's no reason for the mother to disown her. So her choice is some mild embarrassment or slavery and she chooses slavery?
And then the way Karen treats Megan in the car, why should she agree to be her whore if she could just hitchhike to Carol's place? Or even demand the credit card of her sister. Karen makes other mistakes where Megan could have escaped before she was broken or where Carol could have given her big problems.
I also would like a sequel only not with the stewardess but with Tawny finding out what happened between Karen and Lisbeth and getting pissed about Karen trying to muscle in on her slave. Then when Karen returns she could be welcomed with a Taser or a drugged drink. I mean Karen is begging for it, never been fucked in the ass, never taken all of Henry's dick, never haven established who the dominant is between her and Tawny. Imagine all of that happening on her first night back. Breaking her, while she exactly understands what is happening to her would make a GREAT story.
The story has good grammar and spelling and is missing the F/m, F+/m, F+/f, F+/f+, M+/f and watersport labels.
(8/10)

Reviewer: Voracious Reader (Edit) Rating: Dec 14, 2007
One of the best stories. Most excellent to actually have both an official "ending" as well as leaving room for a sequel. (10/10)

Reviewer: dennisthmn (Edit) Rating: Sep 22, 2006
A very good story (9/10)

Reviewer: oldwino (Edit) Rating: Oct 24, 2005
I enjoyed the whole story. The rating is for the total story. I prefer male dom stories. My gf loved it. She loves women sucking her tits. ass and cunt. When we've made her do women she is brutal only using her teeth. She will only do cunts if thier asses are filled ith cock. Making the heroine of your tale a CIA op testing new grugs was orinal and entertaining. Would love to read more tales of slut. (9/10)

Reviewer: BigCat (Edit) Rating: Oct 3, 2005
A long, long, long wild ride. Great opening sequences lading to Carol;'s acceptance of her new role. Then the story become static for a while . Almost too much of a good thing in that it seems redundant though events are new and highly imaginative, then it picks up in the last three or four chapters with the introductions of a new player. A tour de force, actually. Hope you keep writing. You are a fresh and creative voice inthe realm of BDSM erotica. (8/10)

Reviewer: rilawild (Edit) Rating: Aug 20, 2005
I loved the beginning of the story, it started as a great F/f story. The writing was very well done and I didn't notice any grammatical or spelling problems.
However, I felt the story lost it's way around the half-way point, particularly when Tawny was introduced. I'm afraid I got bored. I wouldn't have continued reading except that the beginning was so good. Then the real kicker: the final quarter the story changed completely from a F/f story to F/m one (which is not mentioned in the story codes!)
The author has great potential and I would have loved to have rating this higher, but to me it felt like two stories glued together, and I ended up very disappointed. (5/10)

Reviewer: subgyrl_of_roave (Edit) Rating: Jan 24, 2005
i thought that this was a really great story, so far the best i have read on here. i plan on reading more, thank You for writing a groovy story (9/10)

Reviewer: Zooti (Edit) Rating: Oct 15, 2004
Despite it's length, this story delivers.... (9/10)

Reviewer: sunburststrat (Edit) Rating: Sep 8, 2004
Easy one of my favorite stories on this site. I started to lose interest about the time of the road trip but up 'til then, this was a real page turner. The following from chapter 13 is probably the hottest thing I've ever read:
"What did you do to me?", Megan asked before breaking down into heaving sobs.
"Umm. Duh!?", Karen said mockingly. "I captured you. I ate you. I shaved you. I pierced you. And...Oh, yes, I hogtied you. I think that about covers it."
And then to have Carol practice on her sister Megan (aka Candi)was just too much!!!
Some brilliant stuff here! (9/10)

Reviewer: thehuntedone (Edit) Rating: Apr 27, 2004
A well written story moving from humiliation into full-fledged F/f slave ownership and torture. In stories that cross boundaries like this, one area tends to suffer - as the author often has their own preference. I always prefer a story never to end, so then I can always hope for more chapters. Here however, the story didn't need to end the author needed to rediscover their enthusiasm for the story. If you can't, and it is a hard thing to do if you have moved on to fresher fields, it is best that the story ends. (8/10)

Reviewer: arain (Edit) Rating: Mar 9, 2004
i agree with Roamer...this is a great story, but a good author does know when to end things...i found i became kind of bored...not because it wasn't good, but i felt like it needed to end. Overall though, great read, well written. I really enjoyed it (7/10)
Replied by: Lorddare (Edit) (Mar 9, 2004)
Thanks, at least, for not scoring it a 2. While I was in the process of ending the story I get these observations that it should have ended sooner. But for the ability to warp time, I could satisfy everyone. Oh, well. It was my first story and I'm glad all the reviews were not so harsh as those at the beginning and at the ending. I ended it 3rd on the overall popularity list and that is more than enough gratification for me. Thanks to all who read it, especially those who encouraged me. LD

Reviewer: drake7 (Edit) Rating: Mar 6, 2004
I just read your most recent addition, "Backyard Games," and as good as your story has been it seems to be getting even better.
The sadism that Karen and Tawny exhibit are quite endearing. While I am a heterosexual, I am also a sadistic dominant and the games they have Tom, Henry and the girls play are very enjoyable.
Very good work. (9/10)

Reviewer: evie (Edit) Rating: Feb 29, 2004
i found it very enjoyable to read but it needs a better ending (7/10)

Reviewer: Roamer (Edit) Rating: Feb 24, 2004
You know, good authors know when to end it? Perhaps you should. (2/10)

Reviewer: belladonna (Edit) Rating: Feb 4, 2004
This is one of the best stories i've read so far! It definitely keeps my juices flowing! (10/10)

Reviewer: arobert29 (Edit) Rating: Jan 13, 2004
This is an outstanding story. With a little bit of editing it could be published. (10/10)

Reviewer: jbowler65 (Edit) Rating: Jan 9, 2004
Great story! We loved reading the transformation and humiliation of Carol and eagerly await future chapters. (9/10)

Reviewer: nightskye (Edit) Rating: Sep 14, 2003
it was very good.
i can't wait for the next installment! (9/10)

Reviewer: mkemse (Edit) Rating: Sep 8, 2003
Love the story, would like to see more blackmail come up, more humiliation, real keep her on the defensive at all time, make her feel she is being watched 24/7 make her the ultimate victim of blackmail
also, hope more chapters are added soon and more often (8/10)

Reviewer: julise (Edit) Rating: Sep 7, 2003
Pretty well written. I like the humiliation and bondage aspects. However, (and this didn't affect the rating that I gave) I think that too many slaves are being introduced. A BDSM story gets a little too impersonal (for the reader) when there are more than 2 or 3 slaves. But that is my opinon and like I said I did not use it in my number rating. A very well written story aside from my criticisms. (8/10)

Reviewer: ms_2b_used (Edit) Rating: Sep 1, 2003
This latest chapter of Carols' submission to Mistress Karen and Mistress Tawny was truly beyond matchability! It was by far the most exciting and erotically sensuous story I have yet to read! <sigh>! If ONLY there could be endless stories similiar, this Library would become a true heaven for me! GAWD! How I deeply envy the Carol in this story!!! (10/10)

Reviewer: willpasha (Edit) Rating: Aug 17, 2003
I love Karen's implacability. I see no reason why she needs to be conflicted, nor why fiction needs to be SS&C. I'm willing to suspend disbelief about the technology and pharmacology because they're *almost* possible.
TBH, considering the quality of lots of "published" work, this one is probably an 11 if the ratings scale were to be expanded. (10/10)
Replied by: willpasha (Edit) (Aug 24, 2003)
A very minor quibble: After the trip to collect Henry and Amy, Carol strips in the garage almost immediately after her arrival. However, later on she's noted as wearing her gray shorts and top. ;) In any event, this is still the best story of its type I've run across on the net.

Reviewer: ron8nl (Edit) Rating: Aug 17, 2003
In the beginning I hated the simple sex and youngsters story. Since the thread of killing others that would mind to slut and the captive of sluts sister the story came more in line with a more personal D/s relation between Karen and her slaves: it quit enriches the story. The depersonilisation is the cream on the cake.
Sometimes it seems that the author describes oninteresting details and neglects more important introduction and personality aspects. (8/10)

Reviewer: tttttt (Edit) Rating: Jul 26, 2003
getting too unrealistic...with ahut in nowhere where domination is practiced (10/10)

Reviewer: conchobor (Edit) Rating: Jul 10, 2003
I am impressed with your staying power. No doubt, each reader would alter some part of the story but that misses the point. This is a great story that keeps on coming. I wish "Owned Teacher" could finish with the same energy that you have brought. I am wondering how you will differ Carol's versus Megan's outcome. Thanks for a great read. (10/10)

Reviewer: Emily (Edit) Rating: Jul 7, 2003
The erotic and humiliating charge of this ongoing story is incredible. Simply excellent. (10/10)

Reviewer: tektress (Edit) Rating: Jul 5, 2003
I couldn't stop reading! Absolutely beautiful! (9/10)

Reviewer: subsandyha (Edit) Rating: Jul 3, 2003
The story dosnt have to be perfect but its that good that it gets me wet reading it. And dont listen to the critics, they will always be around. Keep it up. Most exciting story. (10/10)
Replied by: Lorddare (Edit) (Jul 3, 2003)
Thank you!
I write each chapter and upload it without obsessing over it, rewriting it, editing it, or making sure there are no flaws. Of course it could be improved, but some of the criticism has seemed a bit harsh. It's not like I'm getting paid for this or representing myself to be a professional. Boo hoo.
All the great emails I get with each chapter are keeping me going. I've applied a lot of the suggestions I've gotten that way, too.
Anyway - it is nice to get a "10". Thanks again.
LD

Reviewer: vance (Edit) Rating: Jun 16, 2003
Great start and follow through. (10/10)

Reviewer: sada (Edit) Rating: May 29, 2003
Some of the things in this story were really good, but in the beginning, you totally messed up the math when introducing Carol's sister. You mention Carol being young, and then she is quite a few years older than her sister. So it is hard to figure out if she is in her 20s or her 30s. Though the "dom" does carry a lot of power, we see no struggles within her about what to do. She is all-knowing and all-seeing. I think that is a little empty. You also have her oscillating between being completely sadistic to just having a cruel streak with a purpose. It almost seems at the beginning that she is going to kill off all her subs or something.
I like it, and I am still reading it, but I just had problems with the age thing. (6/10)
Replied by: Lorddare (Edit) (May 31, 2003)
Okay.
Megan is 18 and Carol 28. Hope that clears up the math thing. 28 might not be young to you, but you aren't the author.
I doubt most of the readers would be much interested in reading about Karen's angst. I wasn't much interested in writing about it, so she doesn't have any. If I got that deep I'd never finish the thing.
Thanks for reading it. I think.
LD

Reviewer: woolfighter (Edit) Rating: May 26, 2003
The story is believable and highgly erotic. Just pay attention to errors ( like having Megan speak normally with a fresh ring in her tongue.)
Try to finish it, I know it's the most difficult part, at least for me. Good luck. (9/10)

Reviewer: ladys_maid (Edit) Rating: May 25, 2003
I agree with earlier reviewers that this is certainly a very exciting story. It is well written and nicely detailed but I get a sense of deja vu about the storyline - maybe it is too similar to others that I have read and enjoyed. That is not to detract from what is clearly a good piece of work, but I can't help but feel that a little more invention would turn it from a very good story into an outstanding one. (8/10)

Reviewer: LordCrop (Edit) Rating: May 11, 2003
This story was long but well worth it. A good no great story keep it coming. I hope you are going to finish it.
(9/10)

Reviewer: Curtis (Edit) Rating: May 9, 2003
I agree with takenslv and mskneeler. I would give a 9 1/2, and the author should update the story codes (a common complaint with stories of this length). I was not as happy with the dilution of focus caused by the introduction of the younger sister and I wonder about the husband, but this story pushes all of my arousal buttons AND is very well written. (9/10)
Replied by: Lorddare (Edit) (May 9, 2003)
Thanks Curtis. Good feedback. I do plan to address the husband. The sister thing kind of happened like it did in the story - unexpectedly. If I had a plan for the story I wouldn't write it. I enjoy letting it unfold each time I write and get the most out of it when even I am surprised. Hope you keep reading, and I hope I can end it someday! L.D.

Reviewer: mskneeler (Edit) Rating: May 9, 2003
I was terribly misguided by this story as it is lested as a "F/F" one but, to my dismay, there is an AWFUL lot of male misuse of the submissive women in the story! The domination and 'using' of Megan and Carol by Karen is fine, and sometimes exciting but as I related prior to this; far too male-oriented! (5/10)
Replied by: Lorddare (Edit) (May 9, 2003)
mskneeler: Thanks for the point you made about feeling misled. I'll change the listing with the next upload so the story doesn't get crucified by others like you. I have been duly punished by the "5". Ouch.
L.D.

Reviewer: Zen (Edit) Rating: May 4, 2003
You were right kitten this is very good. (10/10)

Reviewer: kittenfemme (Edit) Rating: Apr 20, 2003
Fabulous! I can't wait for more! Oh... to be carol... *swoon* (10/10)
Replied by: Lorddare (Edit) (Apr 26, 2003)
Aw, shucks.
Thanks kitten!
L.D.
Replied by: kittenfemme (Edit) (May 3, 2003)
You're very, very welcome. And a chapter I haven't read has been posted! *purrrrrrrrr*

Reviewer: takenslv (Edit) Rating: Apr 19, 2003
This story could happen. Keep writing, everyone can't be satisfied with ones writig that is why other known writers don't always get excellent reviews too. Some like it hard or medium or soft. Some people like murder mysteries, some like romance. That is why there are different writers in the world. Keep writing. Waiting for your following chapters. Actually, I would give you a 9 1/2. Please keep going. Only I have found a few stories I like others I think are not realistic even though they are fiction. (9/10)

Reviewer: kleintje15 (Edit) Rating: Apr 8, 2003
i liked it i thought it was a very good story for a first time writer (9/10)

Reviewer: merlin (Edit) Rating: Jan 16, 2003
I hope you will continue! (10/10)

Reviewer: S_Couture (Edit) Rating: Dec 20, 2002
An excellent story. I've enjoyed it very much so far. (9/10)

Reviewer: petashley (Edit) Rating: Dec 14, 2002
i'm really enjoying this story, and the addition of the younger sister is just making it better. The author also does a great job of finding the right level of detail, i'm looking forward to reading more (9/10)

Reviewer: object7 (Edit) Rating: Dec 7, 2002
progressing very well, and is keeping my interest with every twist! (9/10)

Reviewer: Parker (Edit) Rating: Dec 6, 2002
I've enjoyed the first 10 chapter, although there were a few parts where it dragged a bit. If it was up to me, I'd have liked to see Carol a little less quick to start enjoying herself, but that's a matter of taste. I'm looking forward to seeing what happens with the sister. (7/10)

Reviewer: djc_sd (Edit) Rating: Nov 20, 2002
Believable blackmailing as well as intersting way Carol is being taken deeper. Can't wait for more. (9/10)

Reviewer: rainee (Edit) Rating: Nov 19, 2002
In terms of writing skills e.g. vocabulary, spelling, punctuation, sentence structure, this story would merit a 9 or 10 on the standards of typical internet writing...It is the content and storyline that caused me to only give it a 6...This reviewer does concede that in the BDSM fiction genre there ARE NO NEW plots or storylines.That being said, if one has read "The Atonement" by racecar ( a true masterpiece in my mind),or to a slightly lesser degree "Owned Teacher", then one has already read this story.I make no accusations towards this author, it's just as I said..."Already written, already read"
This reviewer would be curious to see Lorddare continue this story if for no other reason than to see how this author handles the character of Carols husband in upcoming chapters...Would he have the husband conveniantly stay away as in "Owned Teacher" (in these eyes, the only flaw to that story), or would he have the husband become a willing an eager participant in his wifes torments and humiliations ala'"The Atonement" which puts us back at the already read stage...or would the author have the husband come back with his head in the sand totally unaware to all that is happening to his wife rigt under his nose??? Totally unbelievable even for fantasy writing... We the public will just have to wait and see, assuming the author gets enough kudo's to inspire him to continue.....I by the way, an a submissive female....NOT available (6/10)

Reviewer: gundam (Edit) Rating: Nov 18, 2002
Great start, keep it up (9/10)

Reviewer: texswim (Edit) Rating: Nov 18, 2002
Great humiliation story....keep the parts coming! (10/10)

Reviewer: achach57 (Edit) Rating: Nov 18, 2002
This story is outstanding! Please keep it going!! (10/10)

Reviewer: MrCaldwell (Edit) Rating: Nov 18, 2002
Hey, the author deserves to have this rated. This is the best on site. (10/10)

Reviewer: nancys (Edit) Rating: Nov 18, 2002
this story held my interest and kept my panties wet throughout. a great storyteller with consistent pressure on carol, yet interest in her own needs. will rec to my friends. thanks xoxo Nancy (10/10)

Reviewer: texasmred (Edit) Rating: Nov 18, 2002
I have been enjoying this story. However, I am offended by the author's pleading for ratings. He is rated as the reader sees fit and it seems rather demeaning to himself to be begging for better ratings.
(9/10)

Reviewer: Nitrofox (Edit) Rating: Nov 17, 2002
I am insulted by the Author's comment at the end. If he does not like the ratings he is given, then he is a spoiled brat. We're here to read his stories, but we definitely don't have to, or even need to. My advice? Don't start putting demands on the readers, because I for one won't give him a high rating, just to make him feel it's worth his while to write the story. I don't think the story was that great. The only reason I give it a 4 is because the spelling was ok. If you aren't satisfied with the ratings you are getting, then don't write, but don't think it's our fault that you are getting bad ratings, because the only reason you are getting bad ratings is that obviously you aren't doing well enough to merit high ratings. I for one will not be bribed. I couldn't care less if the author wrote his stories or not. (4/10)

Reviewer: BDSM_Tourguide (Edit) Rating: Nov 17, 2002
What can I say? I liked it. (7/10)

Reviewer: bbeale7 (Edit) Rating: Nov 16, 2002
I Love F/f storys
The Meaner the better
Keep it up
Give Carol a breast implant and body mods (9/10)

Reviewer: tpdar (Edit) Rating: Nov 16, 2002
Very good story. Like the detail - can't wait for the rest to be posted. (8/10)

Reviewer: subshanon (Edit) Rating: Nov 16, 2002
i just love this plot and the story telling
great job Lord (10/10)

Reviewer: chas (Edit) Rating: Nov 13, 2002
I think this author has an excellent writing style. In my opinion, this is the best I have read on this site. (10/10)

Reviewer: billg158 (Edit) Rating: Nov 6, 2002
where is the rest of the story (4/10)

Reviewer: Moggy (Edit) Rating: Nov 6, 2002
Nothing at all wrong with part stories, but this is barely more than a few opening paragraphs. (5/10)

Reviewer: Racecar (Edit) Rating: Nov 5, 2002
A good beginning but that's all. Would have liked author to wait until he a bit more written before posting. (6/10)

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