Hi, I'd reallly appreciate some opinions and advice, please. Sorry, long post! Please read...

My new Master in France is mostly online - we have met and played, but it's difficult. We are both still getting to know eachother, taking it fairly easy in some respects. But he's quite pushy in some areas where I'm not at ease particularly. Exhibitionism being one of them.

When we were first talking, before we'd started playing, he was explaining his relationship and breakup with his last sub - a recent break - and generally discussing his attitude to his subs. He said she had been ill and depressed, and that he had lost her because he had been gentle towards her, when in fact she wanted him to be harsh to help her forget her illness (note - she didn't tell him so). He felt that he had become more inflexible, as a lesson learnt from his previous relationship, and that he expected of me a commitment (to my submissiveness to him) that would move towards the absolute - I'm sorry if my translating isn't always that good! - and that the submissive had to accept the consequences of this inflexibility without talking about blackmail.

I asked him where blackmail came in I'll give you a bit of the dialogue

>I had a girlfriend, who called herself submissive (my italics) who reproached me with that (using blackmail
- Perhaps you were
- We will have to see what happens
> If I have a request
> I expect my companion to respond to it
> If I don't accept refusal
> And for example, leave the conversation
> It's not blackmail
> She took it as 'you do this or I'm going' and considered it blackmail
- It's still being angry - being outraged - perhaps without understanding the refusal, or giving the sub the chance to understand the possible consequences of her refusal
> I generally make things very clear
> Otherwise, I don't make a demand and above all it has no consequences
- I'm not sure I understand the last bit, I think it's something I will have to learn to understand

Well - OK - that conversation was some time back.

Last night, he came to see me (virtual) for the first time for 4 days (he's busy). Since I'm on automatic OD when he's not there, and since I also have to take myself to the edge as part of my daily exercises, you understand, I was quite eager to see him!

Being in France we have shutters. I'm on the top floor with small windows. I had just got out of the shower, and was fully naked. Note, the open or closed state of the shutters has been discussed in the past. Next conversation - we have only just said hello.

- Oh, you'd have been proud of me just now for how I shut the shutters! With cars going by. OK, they're down there and I'm on the 2nd floor but even so
- But yes, I have closed them - windows directly opposite, no no no
> Leave them open!
- I can't, I can't
- They're directly opposite, really, I can't
> Very well
> Goodnight
- No don't do that!
> I don't wish to disturb you
- Oh Monsieur, don't be like that, I beg you
- Don't go
> Then do as I ask
(thinking pause on my part...)
- OK
(I go and open the shutters...)
(he invites me to start webcam)
> Show me the window
(I do)
> Very good
- I'm not a cheat
> I know

Now, I'd like to have discussed that further with him, but suddenly he went on to another subject which is dear to my heart - to do with crops - and it went by.

He's only been domming for 3 years or so, and has only had 3 subs - all of whom were novices - plus one experienced friend who both subs to him (when she is free) and dommed his last sub. And I only found out what a submissive was in about September last year and he is my first real Master - mental, emotional and physical, both involved.

Is this emotional blackmail, and if it is, is it a perfectly valid way for him to get me to do what he wants? I feel angry about it. I feel it is unfair. If I'd said no, he'd have gone. Surely that is not just to me, when he knows - and knew from the outset - that I find any sort of exhibitionism hard? I am trying - I no longer wear any underwear - I went to meet him wearing nothing but a short wrap-around dress (and shoes...) - and it was a WINDY day - I am trying. Shouldn't he also respect that and not push it too far too fast for me? I felt really uncomfortable about this.

And, if it is, let's say, unwise behaviour on his part - how should I go about telling him so, and trying to find ways for him to get me to do what he wants, but not like that?

Thanks all (oh - any passing subs, please feel free to give your opinion, too)