His little one

Sometimes I wonder if I am quite as stable as I like to think lol. I think I have evened out a lot over the years, but I still have this annoying ability to go from being on cloud nine, to feeling like I'm crawling out of the pits.
M got home last night and had to go do stuff for someone today. I was rather bitter about it which brought our moving into question. As it would be set up now, the whole thing intricately involves other people. I hate having our lives/livelihood wrapped up around other people. For that matter, I don't really like people much either lol. So anyways, I was going on about that, and He said we didn't have to move. It's not that I don't want to move, change is good, I believe if you have a chance to live your dreams, you should go for it. And this is His chance.The ironic thing is, it's not as if I dislike them, I just have no room to mold our lives around lazy people who could really make M's life (mine too for that matter) a lot harder than it already is. I freakin hate laziness. I mean, I would be a hypocrite if I said I wasn't ever lazy myself, I just spend a lot of time repressing the tendency lol. If something needs to be done, you do it. That's just the way life is. I just don't want to move for a dream-come-true and end up in a position where life sucks because we spend it taking care of other people's shit. It's hard enough to take care of our own crap.
I dunno, guess I'm just in a really pissed off mood. I got fuck-all for sleep last night because of the kids, and the little one has been glued to my friggin ass for a week. M and I need a day without the kids. Sadly, in another twist of life's painful ironies, my parents just got brave enough to watch the baby and my father's illness has gotten a lot worse over the last couple weeks, so we don't have anyone to babysit.
Ahhh for those zen moments where everything seems as it was meant to be no matter the circumstances. I doubt I'll have one of those today lol.